Growing Pains

To my nearest and dearest faithful readers,

Do you remember waking up at night with that ache in your legs as a child? Did you, like me, call out to your mom to come and see what in the world was wrong with you? My mom would stumble into my room from a dead sleep and explain that it was “only growing pains.” In the dark of the night, however, when things are more dramatic, I remember wondering if it could be something much more serious. It must be if the pain was so constant. I thought then that I was ready to stop growing.

Well, now I’m having those same pains, only with my blog and I do not want to stop growing. I need your opinions. I seem to have become almost bipolar when it comes to my blog these days. I love it some days and marvel at its’ growth, while other days I think who cares what I have to say? Why do I spend so much time with this? Why do I love it so much, but feel so insecure at times about the success of my writing? How would I define success with a blog? How do others define success? I check my stats every day. I check my followers on Twitter – every day. My likes on Facebook, my plus ones on Google+, pins on Pinterest, etc. You get the picture – on Instagram.

Screenshot 2014-09-16 22.57.54

I love my blog. I love the creative process, my improving photography and the interaction I have with people because of it.  My little blog here is a little over a year old and I have worked harder at building this than I have any other endeavor – except my family, of course. I read everything I can get my hands on about blogging. I take photography classes, writing classes and study other blogs to see how they do it. I also subscribe to newsletters to try and understand the mechanics of it all.

Photography Lesson 1

The technical side of blogging has been and remains my biggest challenge. Learning to write code is like learning a new language, only without Rosetta Stone by my side. Can I get an Amen out there, blogger friends?

There are days when I click that publish button and think – this is the one. People will react to this. People will comment on this. And on those other days, I click publish and immediately wish I hadn’t. Move to Trash was likely a better choice. It wasn’t good enough. It was silly. The photography was pitiful. I was too opinionated. My southern slang sounded more redneck than southern….And it goes on and on.

I’ve re-designed the look of my blog 3 times and refocused my purpose so many times I’ve lost track. So… here is your mission, should you choose to accept it… Help me grow without all the pain! After discussing this briefly with another blogger friend, she suggested that I decide what my passion is and then let my blog support that passion. It then dawned on me, as clear as mud, that I had made my blog my passion instead of blogging about my passion.


Here is the difficult part. I have too many passions to choose just one or two. I’m as scatter-brained as your grandmama’s ashes and not ashamed to admit it. I’ve had a hard time staying focused on any one thing for longer than a week or two – except for this blog! For my dedicated readers who know me best, please let me know your thoughts. Here is a list of my passions in no particular order. Which one or two would you most likely follow on a regular basis? And how often would you like to see a post published? Daily, bi-weekly or once a week?

  • Fashion for Women over 40
  • Decorating
  • Family life
  • Empty Nest Ideas
  • Spiritual Life
  • Travel/Entertainment
  • Cooking for Two
  • Friendship
  • Human Interest Stories
  • Photography
  • Current Events

If you’d prefer I stop all this nonsense and do something else… well, may all your pains grow, too! 😉 I’m only joshing. Thank you so very much for reading my posts. Please be kind and leave a comment. I really want to know what you think.

Your blogging friend,


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16 thoughts on “Growing Pains

  1. I think you have compiled a great list here. I call mine a slice of life blog because many things interest me, and I don’t want to be just a decorating or cooking (or any niche) blog. Sometimes I write about things I see or hear that interest me. It takes a while to get into the groove of blogging. I would tell you to just go with the flow — write about what interests you that you want to talk about it. And talk about it in your own voice. It took me a while to be able to do that, because like an idiot, that first year or two I tried to copy what “the popular kids” were doing. When the blog reflects who you really are, I think you will hit your stride and be comfortable with it.

    Since the mechanics of the whole thing interest you, maybe you could make a regular feature of that now and then, sharing something cool you learned. Several years ago when blogging was really catching on, a lot of people wrote highly technical posts, meant to be helpful, but they only put me to sleep.

    It is disheartening, I know, to work and work and work on a post and not get many hits or comments. I don’t get the traffic that many people do because I do not promote myself endlessly. That does not really bother me, because I am not trying to make a living with my blog. I have made a group of good friends, and that is more than enough for me. When I was on several different forms of social media, I became inundated with spam and picked all kinds of undesirable “followers.” I now limit it to FB and Google+ and Pinterest which seem to increase my traffic.

    There are many blogs now closing shop (including some very very popular ones) because they think that it has become a chore, a job, a grind. When you force yourself to post on a regular schedule, I think it does become stale and tired and silly.

    Maybe my thoughts will give you something to think about — just my humble opinions.


  2. Kim, I really enjoy your posts though I may not always comment on them. As for the items on your list. . .I’m personally (and this is just me, not based on your previous posts) interested in the cooking for two, decorating, photography, and travel/entertainment. See. . .even I can’t pick a few. However, if you’ve read my blog, you know that I have the same problem. Make sure you enjoy what you do no matter what!

  3. I’m certainly no expert on this subject but I have always heard that to be a great writer you should write about what you know. I believe you have yielded to that rule and that is why your blogs are so great. Keep doing what you are doing and, as far as how often, I leave that to your own life’s schedule.

  4. Dearest Kim, you’ve echoed so many of my own thoughts and growing blogging pains too. Next February will mark my fifth blogging anniversary, and I can hardly believe I’m still here. I will share a bit of what I’ve learned in this journey. I had three other blogs before arriving at this one, and none succeeded (my definition of success is peace and joy) because I was SO concerned with what my readers wanted. My preoccupation with followers, comments, numbers, etc, was robbing me, and I was anything but successful. I was relentless with all the other social networks too, in order to grow my blog, and when the numbers didn’t add up, I suffered so much disappointment that I would end up pulling the plug completely, starting again from scratch. Four years into the madness, I finally arrived at Marcia Pilar … ME and MY very own creative journal, or as you so graciously called it, devotional picture book. I write what I love, I photograph what I love, I design my page however I like (vs popular blog styles), and I’m finally enjoying it all. One of the things that helped me most was resisting the temptation to look at my STATS, or as I call them, RATS. teehee When I do occasionally, it paralyzes my creativity.
    Please excuse the long comment. I hope it will help you and your readers. As far as what topic I’d like for you to share… whatever Kim loves and enjoys. 🙂

    1. My newest friend,

      Marcia, your comment just painted a beautiful picture of just what I want my blog to be, but haven’t known truly how to get it there. Other friends have suggested that I just relax and be myself, and now you’ve told me how. I’ve been photographing what I see others post. I’ve been trying to write in a way that would gain more followers – and therefore becoming more and more critical of myself when the numbers creep up slower than a herd of turtles. I think in this “drive-thru” culture we live in, I’ve expected that if I do what all the others have been doing, then success would be handed to me through a window with “peace and joy” satisfying my hunger.

      I’ve learned a lot in one year, 1 month and 25 days. And now on day 26, I hear from friends like you and can see the peace and joy on the horizon. Thank you so much for taking the time to leave such a helpful, heartfelt comment!

  5. hi Kim,
    The best way to enjoy your blog is to STOP checking your stats, especially daily! Go where your heart leads~if you write honestly and true, you will feed your soul and others~

    1. Jenna, you are such a precious person. I could hear your heart in that comment and I so appreciate you! Thank you so much. I think you are right. I should write from my heart with the goal of feeding souls. And yes, not checking stats so often will alleviate MUCHO frustration. When are we going to see you again? You are missed!

  6. I love your blog and enjoy the variety. I might get bored if it was all fashion, cooking and travel but a good variety of subjects holds my interest. I don’t get to read them right when they are published but eventually I get on line and get caught up. I love decorating, family life, spiritual life, travel and I think everyone likes human interest stories so just keep up the good work. I would miss them is you should stop. I would never get around to reading it everyday but once or twice a week I could probably find time to sit down and enjoy them.

  7. Hello Kim,
    You have a great blog and a wonderful list of ideas. I’m sure you know what two I am going pick for you…decorating and family life:) You have a beautiful home…so sharing it would be fun. Hang in there and just keep following other blogs with comments and pin away!


    1. Linda,

      Thank you so very much for your continued help and support as this baby blog grows. I am also so touched by your compliment of my home and yes, I like sharing it in so many ways. I will hang in there and thank the good Lord for new friends like you!

  8. I accept your mission.
    My vote is for Fashion for Women over 40 and Decorating ( Fashion for Your Home ).
    I hope you find your passion(s) to write about but no matter which you choose, I will continue to read your blog because I love the way you write.

    1. Dearest W,

      Thank you for accepting my mission and for your vote. But, most of all, thank you for “loving the way I write”. You made the last year+ worth the struggle with that compliment! Hugs.

  9. Kim, Think about what you talk about when you’re sitting with a group of friends or at a big family dinner, like Thanksgiving. Do you limit your conversations to only one subject? I would be interested in everything that’s on your list. I like blogs where the writer talks about more than just fashion or decorating or cooking. I want to get to know them as a person, not just admire their pretty pictures. I like to know what their life is like, maybe follow them throughout a journey, say a remodeling project, a trip, moving, etc. But that’s just me. Writing about current events and being opinionated is tough. It can turn some people off, so I try to avoid those things as most people like to escape the real world a little. As for the overall look of your blog, well, I love it and I wouldn’t change it for a while. So, just as your mom probably told you when you were younger, “Relax and be yourself” and everything will be fine and fall into place. 🙂

    1. Dear Lorraine,

      The more I get to know you through our little blog world, the more I love you!!!! You took the time to speak to every concern I have and I am so grateful! I think you are right about all of it and I’m going to take your advice. I am just going to “relax and be myself” and watch it fall into place. Be on the lookout for posts that look like a big family dinner around the Thanksgiving table. See you in October!

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